I was sitting and wishing I could go back in time and tell my Transitioning Self certain things that my NewlyNatural Self knows now. I will probably make this into a 3 part post, but here are the first couple of mistakes I made once I decided to go natural. Enjoy and apply if necessary!
Combing dry hair
Remember Sunday afternoon? It’s hair washing day at the Kcurly household and I’m in for hours of pain. If only my mom (and countless other mothers) had known what I know now. Small toothed combs and dry kinks and curls do not mix, no matter how much Blue Magic you apply. They don’t even like to be in the same room together.
I still tried to perform this self torture after my BC. There was frustration, there were tears, there were several combs broken clean in two. It may not be true for every natural, but combing dry hair hurts, it damages the hair, and it also takes forever. Now I only comb (or brush with my Denman)with a wide toothed comb and when my hair is wet and soaked with conditioner. And when I can get away with it, I ditch the tools all together and use my God given comb–my fingers!
“Juices and berries”
Once my decision was made to go natural, I just knew that I would now be using oils, maybe a little berry juice. I got a horrendous oil concoction from the Dollar Store, put gobs of it on my hair, wrapped it up with a scarf and went to bed, smug in my certainty that I was a natural gal now and only needed a bit of oil to take care of my hair. After all, it worked for Akeem, and he was able to grow that long pony tail…why not me?
When I woke up the next morning, not only was my pillow stained and greasy (those were new pillowcases too!!) but my hair still felt crunchy. Now I know that oils are great for my scalp and for sealing in moisture, but this is not usually all that I need to keep my hair soft and moisturized. Actually, juiced and berries might have been better than that cheapo oil.
Natural is as natural does
I knew that my natural hair was going to be different than my relaxed hair, but I really had no idea. I still expected it to be the same as before, just curly, maybe a little bigger. I had no idea that natural hair:
- Shrinks as it dries, about 60 percent shorter than it’s actual length
- Has sheen, not shine
- Usually does not move unless there is a very strong wind or it’s in a twist or twist out
- Could tangle and knot, if not prevented
- Grew out and down, not just down
Knowing all of this would’ve saved me a lot of headache trying to make my hair into something it wasn’t meant to be, just as it wasn’t meant to be relaxed and straight.
Here is part 2!
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If only we knew then what we know now. My mother is always getting on me to comb my hair during the week (I only wash on the weekends) and I tell her that if I mess with my hair I’m only going to use my hands. She thinks that’s insufficient.
Sigh.
You hit the nail right on the head! Our poor parents and the misinformation about Black hair care. Thank God for knowledge and people like yourself who take the time to put it out there!
YES this is so true. I thought I was the only one going through difficulties like this.
By the way great blog, I’m glad i finally found a site that I can relate to.